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I've always felt alone my whole life, for as long as I can remember. I don't know if I like if or if I am just used to it, but I do know this: Being lonely does things to you and feeling shit and bitter all the time just...eats away at you.

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After a very long time

RedFog Blog

With this post, I apologize every fan of my mods who has been waiting for a long time for updates, and...thank you everybody, for reading this.

You would surely notice that it has been a long time since I have gone away from internet(not only from moddb, from the whole internet). The reason is...funny; because my home changed to a place where I can only use an internet too slow to be unusable. I'm stupid, don't I?

Many years earlier, due to my parents, I was unable to go outside, except for school and some respective places, e.g., grandpa's home(the whole family go there), etc; the parents did NOT let me go out at all. So, as the one who have to use internet at home, I was completely unable to use internet when it became too slow. Yes, I know that it was my fault not to have tried other ways.

Now, I am at the age of 16(nearly). Moreover, I now really have to take mental medicines as my mind had really been sick. So, thanks to my disease, my parents let me go out(in fact, they let me do 75% of what I want to do). Oh! and don't ruin your day by thinking of me having such disease(mental diseases don't happen to every people). Be happy!

Now, I am at the internet shop, and, only for a while. I can't mod as I have insufficient modding supplies in my pc and lack of time as I have to spend most of my time for studying; this academic year is important for life. But now, I am at the last year of my academic year; I will be at the university next year. After the final exam goes away, I may be back for modding; I will try to be back.

So, you may think how the hell I will be back with that slow internet. Don't worry, I have a plan. My school will pay prizes in money for every distinction got in the final exam, 6 distinctions maximum. I will try my best to have 6 distinctions, get the money, buy the pc with very great specifications and link the fastest internet possible in my country at home(now, I use modem). Just my plan, bored?

I am just writing this because I just wanted all of you to know that I...well, have not completely left the modding yet. Also, in the past, about the depression case(my case), I...lied. I was not in depression. While writing those blogs, I was mostly...happy. Right now, what I know is that even if I have a depression, I should not tell it to everyone, as it may affect them(make them unhappy or annoyed for some time). I am very sorry to have done such a dirty work.

Thank you everyone, for reading this. May you all be happy in your lives! Enjoy your lives! I will be back in months!

Best best wishes,
Tha Lin Htet, aka RedFog

Status

RedFog Blog 5 comments

Well, well well

So much to say but just forgot everything. Well, at least I wanna say that I'm going to pause the development of DARK, as I have no mood...really no mood for it. So, I'll now be reviving Afraid of Monsters: Nightmare and developing it.

Now, it uses no content of Cry of Fear. It is now using the free-to-use contents from different places.

I wanna really show you the development.
Yesterday, spent a whole day and night making bumpmaps for AoM: Nightmare and wanting to test them with some gloss maps. So, this morning, I just made two gloss maps for one of the textures from AoM: Nightmare, and...testedthe textures on a simple test map. And got the result like this.

Well, it gone into a look of Cry of Fear. Oops!

Note: this is NOT using CoF contents nor its engine (renderer). It is just using the paranoia's render. You can view the image in a new link for better.

Mod development

RedFog Blog

I'm sad to say this, but I am restarting DARK again due to the informal map construction that I got in the previous maps. However, I am going to include those maps in an official demo of DARK, to let all of you enjoy the loneliness and horror.

Here's one present from me to all of you

Best Regards
RedFog

Suicide Awareness Day

RedFog Blog 2 comments

Tomorrow is Suicide Awareness Day - Write “love” on your wrist or wear something yellow to show your support for those who have self-harmed, thought of suicide, attempted suicide, or succeeded in taking their own life. R.I.P to all the beautiful lost souls.

Suicide Awareness Day is 10th September, 2012.



Current status

RedFog Blog 1 comment

I still have those depressions

However, I am still a developer and gamer but I am just lazy to mod. When I just made a small map, my mind is already tired, what a fuck.

My body nothing happens, but my mind is already too tired, as I have depressions and lovesick, because I love Susan so much, forever and ever.

I want to tell you something about my future projects. I made team darkness with Hazard for making horror mods and now, hazard has been not online for weeks, so, I am having a little trouble here. He may or may not told me about this, but I am just too sick to see those.

These days will be so boring for development as I just bought anna, the puzzle-solving horror game, and now playing it. That game is damn difficult as I cannot even solve its first puzzle without a walkthrough.

So, I will be taking some puzzle-styles from that game, and some map settings as maps in that game is so realistic and horrifying. Now, I need some help from another modder, so if any of you are interested to join the team darkness, send me pm anytime.

After dark has finished, I will make mods called "sick", "bad dreams", "NeoN" and "memories". All of them will be using trinity render. And about trinity, I now have finished making a sdk and source code, so hope for release around this week. The sdk includes entities that will use more features of trinity, including decal placers and particle managers.

Also, about dark, I will release another demo map which I am now working, but now not only a map, but also a full custom data. Also, I am now making a hd mod for hl, I will post some screens of it later.

Honestly, I am now helping half-life gold and half-life redux, so I am busy a little, thinking, making and uploading. I wish, in the future I can be a good modder, which I am satisfied. I am not much greedy for having the rank of "expert" modder, and I know that I can never be...an expert modder. Yet, if I can get Susan's friendship, I am so much satisfied. Yes, I want to be her boyfriend, but I am satisfied with a friendship, but I am not given.

I am always ready and happy to die.

Best regards
RedFog

Another piece of drama

RedFog Blog 1 comment

Facebook.com
Facebook.com
Facebook.com

I just don't care if you like it or not, I only care whether you read this blog or not.

(Filling the space) (Filling the space) (Filling the space) (Filling the space) (Filling the space)
(Filling the space) (Filling the space) (Filling the space) (Filling the space) (Filling the space)

Best regards
RedFog

Question

RedFog Blog

So, what? Now, I have deleted all my previous blogs, I don't care if people like it or not, but what I know is I have done that.

I shared by personal feelings like a idiot in moddb, but most people said I was grabbing attention. I feel sorry.

Yes, I feel depressed, but I am still online and still working on dark, why? because its my daily work. I have to make mods, I have to share the horror to any players, and I will never stop doing that, till I became a monk.

So, lets take a break from drama and back to gaming. Right now, I am working on dark with hazard. Both of us are working and progressing, so its not dead yet. We had just even created a group to make horror mods even in future. Its Team Darkness, Moddb.com

Still, in the other hand, I am wanting to upload improvement mod for half-life and half-life: source. Before I upload those, I have one question.

Long ago, I asked Andrew, the original creator of trinity render if I can continue working on trinity and I swore that I will not make hl-improvement mod for Half-life using trinity. Then, he told me I don't need to swear and I can continue working on trinity. So, the question is:

If I make the mod "Half-life: remake" which is hl-improvement mod using nearly maximum features of trinity, is it like I am braking my swear?

Thanks and best regards
RedFog